Marriage Monday - November

It's time once again for Marriage Monday, hosted by Chrysalis. This month's topic is "A Love Letter to My Husband".



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Dearest Josh,

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways ...

1. You love me.


2. Your faith in God


3. You love our kids.


4. Your smile


5. Your dimples


6. Your brown eyes


7. You can fix almost anything.


8. You can build almost anything.


9. Your kisses


10. Your hugs


11. You let me warm up my cold feet on you in bed.


12. You're smart.


13. You explain things well without talking down to people.


14. You're humble.


15. You're patient.


16. You play with the kids.


17. You do the dishes so that my dry hands don't get irritated.


18. You give S baths and have bathed all the kids when they were young.


19. You don't mind helping with housework.


20. You make the kids breakfast every Sunday while I get ready for church.


21. You bring me flowers from time to time.


22. You're honest.


23. You work hard.


24. You can cook and bake and don't mind doing it sometimes.


25. You like and appreciate my cooking.


26. You love wearing your grubby "comfortable" clothes but dress appropriately as warranted.


27. You're frugal. (That doesn't always fit on this list!)


28. You let me turn off the radio when the noise bothers me even though you were listening to it.


29. You listen to me talk.


30. You talk to me and share your thoughts with me.


31. You hold me when I cry.


32. You know and understand that when I say "I love you", there is so much more to it than just those three words.


33. You're my best friend.


34. You married me.

Thank you for being the wonderful man and husband that you are.

All my love,

Marriage Monday, Take 2

It's Marriage Monday again over at Chrysalis. This month's topic is, "Girl Talk: Mothers & Daughters Talk About Love". I'm going to loosely focus on the suggested question, "What are you teaching your daughter about love and marriage?"



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My children are fairly young yet with the oldest only being 10, but I still try to insert little tidbits about love and marriage here and there in our conversations as the opportunities present themselves. If my daughters (and sons) remember nothing else as adults about what I've tried to teach them about marriage, I'd want them to know the importance of marrying a spouse who shares the same faith in God as they do and keeping the Lord foremost in their marriage.

This does not necessarily mean that they should marry a person who is the same denomination as they are (since a Catholic and a Lutheran could share more of the same beliefs than two Lutherans ... or two Catholics for that matter). What it does mean is that, when a person is dating another, they should talk about their beliefs and not shy away from them. Discover any differences. Talk about them. Are the differences merely in regard to religious tradition, or are they doctrinal? Can the differences be resolved, or will they be a stumbling block in a marriage?

Marry someone whose shared faith is as devout as yours. This encompasses not only things like how often you each attend church, but how deeply the other's faith is woven into his life. Faith affects a person's moral and ethical views and how he lives his everyday life and treats others.

There was a time when I was a teenager that I didn't think it mattered too much whether I married a person who shared my faith. In my naivete I thought I could just convert them before we married. But as I got a bit older and slightly wiser and thought about it some more, I knew that I wanted a husband who was strong in his faith. I realized that if he was just willing to convert to my faith, his foundation of faith wasn't anchored very strongly in the first place.

Josh and I have talked and expressed gratitude to each other many times over how blessed we are that God brought us together and that we do share the same faith. I honestly do no know how we would have gotten through the events of the past two years without holding the other up and encouraging each other without our shared faith in God and his eternal promises. Whether one of us is at a weak point and the other is strong, we are both clinging to our Father with white knuckles through tears, or we are celebrating an occasion with joy, we are joined in a marriage rooted in Christ. It is he who binds us together.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiates 4:12b

Make God the third and most important strand in the cord of your marriage.

Marriage Monday, Take 1

I enjoy reading Chrysalis' Marriage Monday series of blog posts as well as those of the other women who participate in this meme.

I've never participated in any meme before, so my participation in this week's Marriage Monday is a first in two respects. The Marriage Monday topic for this week is open. Here goes ...



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I love my husband! I suppose that's not a very unique phrase coming from a married woman. I would hope that all wives could truthfully say the same of their spouse.

I like spending time with my husband! Would as many wives also be able to truthfully utter that phrase? If my ears and deductive abilities don't mislead me, I sadly doubt it.

My husband Josh was recently away at a conference for a week (Mon-Fri). The conference was close enough that he could drive to it, but far enough from our home that he needed to stay overnight. In the 12 years that we've been married, this was the longest we've ever been apart. Neither of us liked it. We missed each other. We talked on the phone one night and chatted online 2 other nights.

While Josh was gone, I happened to post on my Facebook status that he was away for the week and I missed him. Then, on the day he was coming home, I updated my status to say I was excited about it. I received a comment from a friend saying something to the effect of being more excited when her husband was leaving for a few days than when he was coming home. I don't know this person well enough to be familiar with her marriage or to know for sure if she was joking, but I certainly hope she was. If not, I feel sad for her and her husband.

This friend's comments aren't uncommon either. Yes, I understand the need to be alone once in a while, but the way this and similar comments are often phrased imply that the wife (I'm saying wife because that's who I usually hear the comments from.) doesn't like being with her spouse. I know that the comments are most likely tossed off jokingly or sarcastically and meant to get a laugh, but this is your spouse you're talking about. Even if the speaker is only joking, how would your husband feel if he heard you? How would you feel if your spouse said the same about you? Didn't you marry this person to be with him, spend time with him?

Maybe I'm naive and just don't get it. Maybe the fact that Josh and I spent our college summers apart when we were dating because we lived 2000 miles away from each other had some bearing on wanting to spend time with each other in our marriage. No, we don't do everything together, but we enjoy being with each other. We enjoy spending time together, even if it's just grocery shopping or running to the hardware store. (Notice it's enjoying the time together, not going to the hardware store itself, per se.) ;) We've both thought that it would even be nice to work together someday.

It hurts my heart to hear someone say they would rather spend time without their spouse than with them. I feel so sorry for that couple. One of the reasons God created marriage was for companionship (Genesis 2:18). I love my husband and can't imagine living life without him. I would never want to give the impression that I don't like being with him. He is God's best earthly gift to me.

I love my husband. I like spending time with my husband. I am blessed!